Immigration…to tell or not to tell.


Datingish had this article on their site recently.  My answer to this story was “Call Immigration.  Problem solved.”

I found it quite humorous that someone actually took exception to it.  Someone thought I was just horrible for not “understanding the situation”.  For those of you who haven’t read the article here is a synopsis:

Girl doesn’t love her boyfriend.

Girl is too chicken to tell him.

Girl has cheated on him.

He has been abusive to her pet.

He sleeps in her car.

He doesn’t work.

He has threatened suicide if she breaks up with him.

He is in the United States ILLEGALLY.

Alright, this young woman has done nothing morally correct in her situation with this man.  She has broken the law by harboring an illegal immigrant into the country.  She has done nothing but be dishonest and lie throughout the entire situation.  He on the only hand seems to prove that he is mentally unstable with his animal abuse and threats of suicide.

Why would you NOT call immigration?

There is a very long and detailed process to get someone into this country through immigration.  It requires tons of paperwork and around $2,000 to get an immigrant into this country and that is IF they are family.  You have to show you can support these immigrants by living above the poverty level.  The process takes at least 2 years to finalize and that is for family.  This does not include everyday people in other countries who just want to change their lives.

The people who want into the country have to have medical examinations.  They have to prove their intentions.  They have to wait an undetermined amount of time to be approved, and yet this guy sneaks his way into the country, he’s obviously mentally unstable, and people argue that his illegal immigration status is not the “problem”.  While I agree that the original poster has a problem with lying and dishonesty, in my opinion, the best thing she can do to remedy this situation is report him.  Report him before he hurts someone who is here legally and who has a right to be here.


If you were sure you knew an illegal immigrant would you report that person?

Author: Jill Stewart

I am a 37 -year-old woman from Arkansas who is happily married to a Scottish immigrant aka “the hubby” “the hubs” or if I am calling him directly “YO YOU!” We’ve been married for 3 years and it’s been a crazy ride, and unfortunately our finances have been beat to death in the last few years. We have two dogs and a cat, no kids. The Blog- What’ll you find: Financial Information as we try to become debt free My attempts at working and trying to maintain a home to the standards I like My adventures in learning how to sew Arts and craft projects Funny tidbits from my life including living with a Scottish person, the dogs, and other oddball things that happen to me. What you won’t find: Much on children. I don’t have kids and I can’t have kids. Recipes- I don’t mind cooking, but unless it’s something really special, don’t come here looking for the weekly recipe! You won’t find it- unless you ask my husband. If you’re interested in what you see, please follow me on Facebook or sign up for emails! Most of all, leave a comment or ask a question! I am always happy to hear from you!

13 thoughts on “Immigration…to tell or not to tell.

  1. If that person was a loser and doing nothing here, yes I would call but if they were just trying to make a better life for them and their family, I cant say that I would. I would feel awful.

  2. Damn this sucks…in this case she should rat him out because he seems to be mentally unstable and totally unfit to be with her.

  3. I would report only if the illegal immigrant causes problems to some individual or the community. If not, I let them be.

  4. My daughter is living in Ireland right now because of the difficulty getting her husband into the states legally.  Why should my daughter have to live in another country because she doesn’t want to break the law while some mentally unstable yahoo is mooching off our country?  Doesn’t seem fair does it?  Report ’em all and then maybe we’ll have room for legit family members without the years of hassle and untold thousands of dollars.

  5. Panchito, my husband of 12 years, was in the U.S. illegally. Because of the right-wing hypocricy in the US there was no way for him to be legal despite the fact that had we been straight, I could have married him and the problem solved. This is why we are now living in Canada. The solution of “just calling immigration” is wrong on many levels. Number one, its using the federal immigration system for a problem that belongs with the local police. If that girl is so brave to call immigration, why can’t she call the police? Number two, I know for a FACT that unless he is committing a felony, (or immigration wants to grandstand in the media and make a BIG sweeping raid on many immigrants), they are NOT going to spend their time chasing a domestic dispute. My brother works in federal law enforcement and knows tons of people in the country illegally. If they are living their lives and not making problems, immigration tends to leave them alone. Because this guy is an abusive asshole, I think the emotional waters get muddied a bit.No human being can ever be “illegal”

  6. tough question over all and to me not an easy answer.have i done this…yes and no.  but each was a different situation.  in the problem stated above…if i was this girls friend and knew of this, then yes. and yes she should report him. the immagration problem here in the states is a big problem and complex, with no real goals, i feel, to fix.  the federal people say it is a state issue and the states say it is a federal issue.  in the mean time good people trying to better themselves are being tossed out and bad people stay by working the system. i guess the law should be upheld no matter what. isnt that why there are laws?  and if they need changing, change them.  the key word in all this is “illegal”. if we follow the letter of the law…bye-bye. 

  7. @Mamabee00 – Ahh but define “loser”.  If you saw someone breaking into a house would you call and report it?  An illegal immigrant is breaking the law too.@joeysmore – Some do and some don’t, but I love to rile the people who don’t 😉@CdllcEnthus – It is a tough call.  However, because of his instability, I agree he shouldbe reported.@ihsankhairir – Where do you draw the line?  What do you define as a problem?  Taking work from a citizen of the country?  Committing a crime?  Threatening suicide?  (Just examples.)@indigolady – You and I should talk about this more and soon!  @Joeyj1220 – She can’t call the police because he hasn’t hurt her.  He has shown sign of abuse to the animal.  I have personally seen in the new in my state A LOT of large “stings” on companies who hire illegal immigrants.  I don’t believe that a felony is the only reason they will chase down and illegal immigrant.You say it was because of right wing conservatives.  However, did you see the comment posted where indigolady’s daughter married and Irishman and had to move there to be with him because she couldn’t get him in the states?  Being gay is not the only issue.  Your husband could have applied and waited out the terms of the application like thousands of others chose to do on a regular basis.  However, rather than waiting on those terms you moved to a country that gave other options.  There is nothing wrong with that.  However, I do think there is an issue with wanting to live in a country and not follow the “rules” when it compromises the safety of the country.  Laws are in place to protect the society as a whole.  What if your husband had been a terrorist?  Would it have been ok with you then that he was here for 12 years?  Would it have been ok if he were a psychopath who snuck into the country and murded an untold amount of people?  To me these are the things we need to consider when we chose to ignore immigration laws.  They SUCK for people who are trying to do it legally…6 months of research on the topic myself.  However, someone who is potentially dangerous as this man has shown himself to be, is reason enough to me to have him deported before he does hurt himself or someone else.@buddy71 – That is pretty much my exact standpoint.

  8. @Southernlass – All I am saying is that INS will do nothing when she calls. They will direct her to the police. Their job is not to settle domestic disputes and they will NOT go after him unless he is smuggling drugs, or arms, etc. And FYI, my husband WAS originally  in the country legally on a student visa. He could NOT apply for citizenship (it is a myth to think one just needs to apply and then get in line and wait). For some countries that is possible (it is called the visa lotto, but he is from Mexico and Mexicans are not allowed to participate). The only way he could have done it is two:  one would have been Marriage, and yes, it still would have taken time, but that would NOT have been possible for us. I cannot comment on the Irish situation since I do not know it. The second is as a skilled worker in very specialized industries. My husband is not a doctor or computer engineer, so nix that one. A terrorist??? LOL!!! He is Mexican! The terrorists who enter the U.S. do so LEGALLY (they have the money and resources to do so). All the 9-11 terrorists were here in the US on student visas!And of course there is nothing wrong with us moving to another country that is more enlightened than the U.S. The point is that I am an American citizen and I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO! I should be able to sponsor him like any other married couple gets to. My country has made me ashamed on the immigration issue. The U.S. wants cheap labor, people to pick their crops, take care of their lawns and kids who will work for slave wages, then bitch and complain that the “illegals” are taking away jobs from Americans (who didn’t want those jobs in the first place).xen·o·phobe   (zěn’ə-fōb’, zē’nə-)  Pronunciation Key  n.   A person unduly fearful or contemptuous of that which is foreign, especially of strangers or foreign peoples

  9. @Joeyj1220 – It’s not a domestic dispute.  He has not abused HER YET…A Mexican can’t be a terrorist?! ;)Mexico not being part of the lotto?  Wonder why that is.I am aware of the ways to get people into the U.S.  I’ve been researching it for quite some time.However, your issue here seems not to be with immigration, but with gay marriage.  If you were legally able to marry YES you would be able to do things like a married couple.  What you are ashmaed of from the tone of your answer is the gay rights issue, and not so much immigration.

  10. @Southernlass – So we’re talking POTENTIAL abuse? Wow… its like living in the Spielberg movie “Minority Report” where someone gets arrested (in this case deported) for what they MIGHT do! Lord, under that criteria I could have been arrested years ago many times over. And yes, much of my problem (in my own personal case) is a gay issue, but a lot of the hysteria (and yes, racism) that is present in the immigration issue is incredibly disturbing to me as well.

  11. @Joeyj1220 – No, he should be deported for being an illegal immigrant.  No other reason. 😉

  12. @Southernlass – But just think if we did that: Where would all the Americans get their cheap produce, and cheap domestic labor, and cheap construction? Since white people don’t have blacks to bully around any more, if all the “illegals” were kicked out, who would the whites have to go after? I say let the “illegals” stay so white people can have someplace to put their bigotry. I especially love anti-immigration sentiment coming from so-called Christians. Cracks me up.

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