A Squirrel Tail


On Sunday, I was watching TV and I heard this weird scuttling noise on my porch.  I open the curtains, and sure enough a rotten little squirrel was hanging UPSIDE down off of my roof and shaking the food out of my birdfeeder.  OK, normally, it wouldn’t have irritated me, but I had JUST filled it the day before.

I went outside and of course the squirrel ran on the roof.  He forgot something though…his tail.  So, I stood there and started at this scrawny little tail hanging over the edge of my roof.  I stood there and had an internal debate about what would happen if I grabbed his tail and tried to pull him off of the roof.  I was a bit afraid I would end up on the Darwin Awards this year (how lame would it be to say died from pulling squirrel tail?), or that it would be some kind of crazy attack squirrel like the bunny in Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail.

I grabbed a big push broom that was on the porch, and poked his tail with it.  The little turd STAYED there, so I whacked his tail again.  Then I stood there and seriously considered yanking his tail AGAIN.  I chickened out though and hit the gutters with the broom instead so it would run off.

Today…I wish I had pulled his tail to see what would have happened.

What would you have done?

Author: Jill Stewart

I am a 37 -year-old woman from Arkansas who is happily married to a Scottish immigrant aka “the hubby” “the hubs” or if I am calling him directly “YO YOU!” We’ve been married for 3 years and it’s been a crazy ride, and unfortunately our finances have been beat to death in the last few years. We have two dogs and a cat, no kids. The Blog- What’ll you find: Financial Information as we try to become debt free My attempts at working and trying to maintain a home to the standards I like My adventures in learning how to sew Arts and craft projects Funny tidbits from my life including living with a Scottish person, the dogs, and other oddball things that happen to me. What you won’t find: Much on children. I don’t have kids and I can’t have kids. Recipes- I don’t mind cooking, but unless it’s something really special, don’t come here looking for the weekly recipe! You won’t find it- unless you ask my husband. If you’re interested in what you see, please follow me on Facebook or sign up for emails! Most of all, leave a comment or ask a question! I am always happy to hear from you!

8 thoughts on “A Squirrel Tail

  1. That is hilarious.  I would have taken a picture 🙂  Or maybe gotten some gloves and pulled his tail, just to say I had done it.

  2. I always get tickled watching the squirrels eat from the bird feeder I have, so I would have just watched him.  lol.  I don’t think I would have had the nerve to pull his tail.  Those things can be mean if they want to be

  3. I don’t know what I would have done, but I almost wish you had pulled his tail. Now I’m in an agony of curiosity. Would have served the little bugger right too. lol

  4. @Ultra_Bright – @harmony0stars – If I get the chance again, I am sooooo pulling it’s tail!@Blue_ButterflyBaby – I don’t mind them eating the stuff, but they are actually yanking the feeders down and I am afraid they are going to break them.

  5. Tsk….see…I would have pulled it.

  6. Squirrels are just targets on four feet. Or better yet, rats with fluffy tails. They will definately damage your birdfeeders if the need to get the seeds out makes it necessary. Don’t pull the tail. They can be nasty when they have to be.

  7. Heck! I’ve seen Monty Python, there’s no way I would pull that tail. “That’s the most foul, cruel and bad tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.” and if that doesn’t convince you……”Lookit the bones.”

  8. @indigolady – I think I saw the little stinker this morning.  It was a baby…so cute.

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