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Dear Men,

The truth is women are not as complicated as you would like to make us out to be. Oh, I know, and I hear you protesting now, but the truth is if we are complicated it’s because of you. Women are really quite simple, it is the failure of men to listen to the things that women want that make us seem difficult. Here is a list of some of the things women want. Once I have given you this sagely advice it is up to you to use it!

1. Honesty

If there is something that will ruin your chance with a woman faster than a concord can fly across the ocean, it’s a lie. We hate it. Now, when I say honesty, I mean honesty in all things, and if you are not prepared to be honest, then don’t bother wasting our time. We have memories that would scare the socks off of any database, and if you lie we will catch it, and THEN your life will be complicated.

2. Security

I don’t mean money. The truth is *most* women out there don’t give a crap about your money. What we do care about is your ability to make us feel safe. Your ability to be there for us when we need it, even if you can’t understand why there is a big wet spot on the front of your shirt, and we are sniffling in your arms. Even if you stare at us like someone handed you a screaming newborn and you don’t know what to do with it, we need you to make us feel secure with you and with the loopholes in life.

3. Loyalty/Fidelity

We’re women. We can find men who want to get into our pants 24/7. What we want is someone who cares more about us than getting into our pants. Don’t get me wrong, women love sex, well most do, and once you have our hearts you are in for some of the best sex you will ever get. However, let us hear you talking trash about that great lay to your guys friends, or let us hear about the stream of other women you have hanging around, and we’ll leave so fast your head will spin. Don’t use us. We can find men to do that all day long, and it’s not what we want.

4. Step Outside of Your Comfort Zone

You might hate going outside and having a picnic. You might hate opera, or show tunes. However, if this is something your woman likes, you should bend for her a little and suck it up a little to go out of your way to do these things for her. I can assure you women are never too proud or embarrassed to go to a sporting event they know nothing about in order to spend time with you, and that same sentiment should be reversed. It shows you care about her even if it is not something that makes you giddy.

5. Be Yourself

Women would honestly rather know right out of the gate if you are someone she can potentially be with. If you are not yourself, you are basically lying (see #1 AND #3) to her about the real you. The truth is women can handle flaws in you. We can respect that if we believe in abortion and you don’t that it might not be a good relationship. We can understand that if you want six kids and we want zero, that you are probably not a guy we need to date. The thing is, we need you to tell us these things up front so that we don’t waste our time and emotions on a guy who is not going to stick around in the long run. We don’t need the fluff to make us feel better about ourselves so that later on you can tell us you didn’t mean it. Be yourself. Would you want a woman who wanted you any other way?

 


18 Comments

A place I never would have imagined

I’m awake now and feeling better at the moment.  Something I hope will stick through for the rest of the week because I really don’t want to miss work.  Cross your fingers for me that this fever stays broken and I can get back to normal!  I need a shower….yay for sweating all day long!

Anyway, I have a friend named Kelly.  I met Kelly in high school, but we were in two completely different circles.  He was the kind of guy who sat in Chemistry with his head down and never said a word to anyone.  I was the semi-popular band geek who everyone knew because of my band geek status and achievements within the music community.  We were different, and not that I had anything against him, I just didn’t know him.

Fast forward several years, and guess who ended up working at the same company as me?  That’s right Kelly.

Kelly

All I could remember about him was the time our Chemistry teacher was getting on to him in class for being sarcastic and she called him “Master Bates”.  *snicker*  So, over time I got to know him again, and let’s just say the image I had of him in high school was not the person he was years later.  Over time we actually became pretty good friends, and I was subjected to listening to far too many details of his personal life.  However, it developed into a more personal relationship than I thought I would have ever had with him 12 years ago.

Funny thing is, somewhere along the way I didn’t realize how close we became as friends.  I didn’t realize immediately that he started calling me any time he had a personal problem.  I didn’t realize that he trusted me with the more serious aspects of his life.  I didn’t realize exactly how far our friendship (and that is all it is) had grown through the years.  I didn’t realize that when I ignored his call last night because I felt bad, that I was letting him down.  I certainly didn’t realize he would call me again today and have a break down on the phone.

His grandmother died.  She was pretty much the woman who raised him, the women who was his role model for everything in life and the woman who bailed him out of trouble in his youth.  He called me.  He cried.  He told me to change the subject to make him laugh, and this is what I told him.  “You know, ten years ago, I never would have expected to be in this position today with you.”  He laughed, so I guess it worked.  I’m sorry I let him down last night, and I hope he heals from this loss soon.  I am honored I was the person he called, and I can honestly say I NEVER saw that one coming.  Funny how life changes you.


11 Comments

A few photos from Mother’s Day

These were just some random shots I took of my Mom, my brother Tim, and his fiance’ Kara.  I am hiding the ones of me from that day since we went to dinner at 5pm, and I woke up at 3:30pm that day…. HA!

MomandTim

She totally doesn’t look almost 51 to me!!!

momtimkara

That is Kara on the right.  I love her!  Her hair is naturally as curly as mine, but she is going to Cosmetology school, and has been cutting my hair.  Love her!  It’s hard to find someone who can cut curly hair!


28 Comments

The Top 10 Reasons Pirates are Better Than Ninjas!

10.  You can actually see a pirates face.  What is the point of being notorious if there is no way for someone to recognize you?

9.  Boots that roll down at the knee are sexy!

8.  Their bodies are worth something when they die.  Can we say gold teeth anyone?

7.  Pirates are allowed to talk while on the job.  YARRRRR!!!

6.  Pirates can work during the day and don’t need the cover of night to kick butt.

5.  They have parrots!  Hello! 

4.  Pirates have traveled all over and are full of worldly knowledge.

3.  Pirates sing the best songs.

2.  Wenches, enough said.

1.  Do you see a ride at Disney World called “Ninja’s of the Orient”?  No, I didn’t think so.


Due to the debate this has spawned, I reserve the right to add any additional reasons why pirates are better than ninjas at any point in time.  If you want to see a goofy refute of my perfect logic, go see the lyrics”ninja”.

Also, this is a fun site!

PiratesVersusNinjas

More Pirate vs. Ninja Fun